What. In the fresh Hell. Was. I. Thinking?
I’m 12-weeks post-partum and just HAD to schedule a fix with my guilty shopping indulgence, Stitch Fix. I still have 10-15 pounds left to lose to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight, and let’s be honest, it doesn’t even matter because nothing will ever look right on this mom bod again. Except maybe a muumuu. Or just a large nondescript sack.
Yet, I persist in my optimism that I may again wear and look cute in clothing that isn’t sold in the sleepwear section of Target. It didn’t hurt that my mom was optimistic enough to buy me a gift card to SF for Christmas, which I immediately vowed to save until Spring when I lost 15 pounds-again with the optimism.
Three hours later, I scheduled a fix.
This is actually my fourth fix, and while the prices are often a tad higher than I think they should be, I consider it a nice way to treat myself since I don’t get my nails done, dye my hair, get massages, or otherwise indulge myself in much else, save for the occasional venti mocha. (Non-fat milk, with whipped cream, because my life choices are a contradiction.) I also have learned that clothes shopping with my three-year-old is a feat that could only be successfully accomplished with the use of tranquilizer dart. And they really frown on that at The Gap. So I treat myself to SF to feel fabulous every once in a while.
In case you’re not familiar, Stitch Fix is a subscription box service which pairs you with a personal stylist who chooses 5 clothing or accessory items for you based on your style survey, Pinterest board, and whatever desperate note you leave for him/her. Here’s mine from this fix:
What I probably should have written:
To be clear, this is not a sponsored post-much to the relief of Stitch Fix, I’m sure. However, if you decide by some magical force that this post, filled with my neuroses and self-deprecation, influences you to try out this service, if only to deal with your own neuroses, then please feel free to use my referral link, which gives me credit towards my future life crises and inevitable subsequent fixes.
Now let me wrestle my fix away from the dinosaurs, and we’ll get to it.
Cuuuuuuute! I will live in them forever. They meet all my clothing requirements these days: stretchy and comfy. They look good with the tops I received in this fix. And also this bottle, which is my main leggings accessory these days.
The real question here is: are they good for chasing a toddler who is running at top speed through the aisles of the grocery store? Eh, maybe, but while the color is nice, it won’t match anything in my closet (hahahahahahahaha, like I match at all these days!) For now, my old tried and true Toms will work just fine.
Here’s my lavender piece that I asked for because I saw in some random fashion article that lavender would be the hot color for spring, and this dusty lavender is gor-gee-us. But the length is a problem for me. As soon as I would bend down to my toddler’s level to deliver my “shape up right now, you tiny destructive human being” speech, I risk stepping all over it. Or worse, tripping myself trying to get back up and completely wasting the effectiveness of my schpeal. Not that it was effective anyway.
Hide the diaper blowouts, hide the spit up stains, hide the belly. Win-Win-Win. Plus, how amazing is it that this blousey shirt that looks like my kids have been crawling and pulling on me all day long is actually fashionable? Best of all, when I put my hands on my hips I look bigger and more intimidating à la National Geographic. Sorry you can’t actually see it (thankyoutoddler!) but you’ll have to take my word for it.
Knit Riot Frida Graphic Knit Top, $28 – Keep, Exchanged for next size up
Oh yes! Just what I needed and specially requested! A shirt of 50% truth and 50% FIL-THY LIES. It’s super soft, though, so I’m going to size up and keep it. And even though no one will be able to see it (thankyoubaby!), it’s joyous message of calisthenics and caffeine will ring in my heart all day.
Overall, this was a great fix, put together by a great stylist who is also a mom and knows what’s up. Two tops and one pair of leggings later, I feel refreshed-it doesn’t take much these days. But that means it’s now time to gather up all the worn down and stained maternity clothes that I’ve worn for the past 297 days, and burn them in the backyard while dancing under the full moon and sipping my nonfat mocha with whipped cream.
Please take note that I’m not a fashion blogger nor a professional photographer. (I know, I had you convinced there for a minute, didn’t I?) I don’t do my hair, put on makeup or attempt any “styling” whatsoever these days, but that’s an accurate look at my life as a mom with a 3-year old and a 3-month old. I raise tiny adorable heathens and write moderately entertaining essays when the mood strikes. I also occasionally order a “fix,” and if you would like to try it too, please feel free to use my referral link.
Or better yet, ask a mom friend if they use SF and use her referral link. Because everybody loves $25 to put towards new clothes, especially moms who don’t always get the chance to treat themselves, but most certainly deserve to do so.