Easy peasy money, right? Oh sure! No prob at all! You can consign too in just 32 steps:
1. Find a local consignment opportunity.
2. Sign up. Do not read the fine print. Do not read about their numerous “service fees” and just how much they’re going to take off the top of the sale of all your stuff.
3. Wait for the kid to go to bed and bring up the bins of old stuff.
4. Chug a monster cup of coffee (or cocktail).
5. Unpack bins in living room and spend 2-4 hours waxing nostalgia.
6. Put aside 20% of items because they were your absolute most favoritest thing ever. EVER.
7. Put aside 15% of items because you’re pretty sure they were gifts from grandparents or special friends. Did great-grandma Rose get us this outfit? Or was it this one? Oh well, let’s just keep them both.
8. Put aside 5% of items because your ovaries are aching and maybe, just maybe, you’ll have another child.
9. Put aside 3% of items because you’re not really sure why, you just don’t want to get rid of it yet.
10. Feel overwhelmed.
11. Regret signing up to consign.
12. Check refund policy. Curse.
13. Start inventorying and tagging clothes randomly. Throw them into piles all over the room.
14. Get into a groove of sorting items that involves little dollar signs popping up in your eyes.
15. Start tagging those “special” items you set aside because – Yay Money!
16. Change your mind and rip the tags off your “special” items. Cradle items in your arms and promise to never let them go.
17. Ignore your stressed out husband as he looks at all the piles of stuff in your living room and asks why you’re cuddling crib shoes.
18. Yell at husband for touching one of your piles and insist he leave the room unless he can keep his mitts to himself and stop messing up your chi.
19. Realize that you cannot leave the room without crawling over several knee-high piles of stuff.
20. Get tired and take a nap on a pile of soft cotton newborn onesies.
21. Wake up and realize you have to pee.
22. Trip over huge pile of clothes blocking the doorway, try not to pee your pants.
23. Return and finish tagging and sorting items.
24. Re-tag those “special” items again, because YAY MORE MONEY!!!
25. Pack items back into plastic bins.
26. Deliver bins to consignment drop-off.
27. Change your mind in the parking lot, and frantically pull out those “special” items from your consignment pile to keep forever and ever.
28. Imagine all the great stuff you’ll buy for yourself with your consignment money.
29. Receive money for consigning – YAY MONEY!!!
30. Try not to think about the percentage of your money they took out.
31. Pull out a calculator to determine just how much money those money-grabbers skimmed off the top.
32. Buy your kid more clothes and toys.